Renaissance fair visitor refuses to defend girlfriend after another visitor claims her cheering during joust show scared his son: ‘I got up and walked away’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Apr 17, 2026 5:45 PM EDT

The most important lesson for a medieval gentleman is to always defend your lady's honor.

The gentleman in the story below, unfortunately, failed.

For a first-time visitor to a Renaissance fair, it could be a lot to take in. There is so much going on, so many different people in different outfits, music on every corner, and foods you have never seen in your entire life. Those who are regular visitors tend to feel right at home in this environment, but others might feel a bit overwhelmed.

But even if it is your first time at a Renaissance fair, it is important to embrace the wonders of the fair and go with the flow. You're not there to change how things are done or criticize other visitors; you are there to have fun and explore a setting people don't get to experience in their day-to-day. And if that doesn't work for you, maybe you should avoid visiting altogether.

Two people in the story below probably should have avoided going to the Renaissance fair. The first was a dad to a young boy, who, during a joust show, reprimanded another visitor for cheering too loudly and scaring his son. Sorry, Dad, but if loud cheering scares your son, taking him to a joust show during a Renaissance fair might not be the best idea, and other visitors are not to blame for that.

The other person who shouldn't have attended the event was the boyfriend of the visitor who got reprimanded by the dad. It was his first time at a Renaissance fair, and when his girlfriend was told to be quiet during the performance, he agreed with the dad instead of defending his girlfriend, even though everyone else around him agreed that the dad was in the wrong.

Feeling unsupported, the girlfriend left the show, but that didn't urge her boyfriend to act like a gentleman. Scroll to read the rest of the story.

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  • A man in a medieval outfit standing next to a horse
    via Andrej Lišakov

    A man in a medieval outfit standing next to a horse.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • AITA for not quieting down at a Renaissance fair and walking away after my boyfriend sided with a stranger?

    I (23F) went to a Renaissance fair with my boyfriend (26M) and my sister. My sister and I go to events like this regularly, but it was my boyfriend's first time.
    via Dry-Egg2898
  • At these events, people dress up, interact with performers, and cheer loudly during shows. I was acting how I normally do,engaging with the environment and cheering during performances.
    via Dry-Egg2898
  • During a joust, I was cheering along with the crowd (nothing inappropriate, just typical cheering). A man sitting in front of me turned around and said I was "scaring his child" and asked me to stop.
    via Dry-Egg2898
  • Before I could respond, my boyfriend told me I should "quiet down a little." That upset me, especially since the event itself encourages loud crowd participation. Another
    via Dry-Egg2898
  • person nearby even commented that the man was out of line. I felt embarrassed and unsupported, so I got up and walked away to calm down. My sister came with me. We had
    via Dry-Egg2898
  • already planned to split up after the joust, so I didn't think it was a big deal to take some space. A few hours later, my boyfriend found us and was upset, saying I
    via Dry-Egg2898
  • Renaissance Woman in Blue Dress in Forest Setting
    via Vika Glitter

    Renaissance Woman in Blue Dress in Forest Setting.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • had abandoned him at an unfamiliar event. He also said that if a child is scared, people should adjust their behavior regardless of the setting.
    via Dry-Egg2898
  • I disagreed and felt like I shouldn't have to change normal behavior in that kind of environment. We ended up arguing, and it escalated more than it should have.
    via Dry-Egg2898
  • Added: Before the joust we had a detailed plan of separating for an hour ish after the joust. We each wanted to do different things happening at the same time frame so we planned to part ways
    via Dry-Egg2898
  • and meet back up at the place | wanted to go since it was a group activity. My sister and I did separate for a time and she came back and joined me at the location talked about. I figured
    via Dry-Egg2898
  • my boyfriend would do the same, which is why I was more ok with walking away from the situation.
    via Dry-Egg2898
  • AITA for not quieting down and for walking away?
    via Dry-Egg2898
  • Radio_Mime Your cheering scared his child, but men on large horses charging at each other with lances doesn't? Where did the guy think he was?
    via Radio_Mime
  • Appropriate_Move5242 The parent must not have been familiar with the environment. If my child was scared I would remove him. What kind of a parent doesn't do that?
    via Appropriate_Move5242
  • AAvacadooThaaanks NTA your bf is being ridiculous. I know exactly what event you are talking about, and it's a loud and exciting event where the audience is expected to cheer loudly. That parent should have taken their kid away from the event if they were getting scared. Not blame you. And your BF sounds like a total
    via AAvacadooThaaanks
  • pushover tbh. One complaint and he's fighting you in defense of a stranger? Get bent, he should have stood up for you and suggested to the man that he take his child somewhere else. I hope he apologizes.
    via AAvacadooThaaanks
  • Dry-Egg2898 OP This happened pretty early on in our relationship and we still can't come to an agreement on the matter. It's still a sore spot and when brought up starts a bigger fight.
    via Dry-Egg2898
  • eregina3 NTA If the child is scared the parent needs to remove the child from that setting. This is not a quiet place where expectations are to be quiet. This is on the parent.
    via eregina3
  • Harrykeough1 If the guy wants a quiet place for his kid maybe the Renaissance Joust was the wrong choice!
    via Harrykeough1
  • baboonontheride NTA- something to think about OP... if he's not gonna have your back in a low stakes situation, what makes you think he'll be on your side for the important stuff?
    via baboonontheride
  • buttercupgrump NTA The joust is notoriously the loudest, most crowded event I've seen at any faire I've been to. If the child can't handle cheering, that is not the place for them to be.
    via buttercupgrump

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boyfriend joust renaissance faire live performance visitor relationships parenting girlfriend sister show
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